Matt and David Talk About a Mutual Acquaintance

The names and one descriptive term has been changed to protect the innocent (and cover our asses). 

David: do we know anyone in kentucky/indiana/tennessee/alabama?

Matt: Do people live in Indiana?

  I thought it was just Highway and tire burning factories

 David: i know

  i think Jane does

  but i don't really care

 Matt: As in Larry’s little sis'

 David: mmhm

 Matt: because he is an asswipe

 David: i heard he was a little creepy with Kathy/Lynn

  but what about him is rectal?

8:57 PM 

Matt: Job title: Remarketing Logistics Coordinator at Budget Rental Center

  Status update:Take me down to the Paradise City where the grass is green and the girls are pretty. Oh won't you please take me home!

8:58 PM 

David: hm?

  hahaha

  really?

 Matt: There are two pictures on his timeline of him doing the shocker

  hand signal

 David: isn't he like an evangelical of some sort?

Matt: I have no idea, but no man should post: "I seriously have the best friends ever. Everyone else should be Jealous. I love you guys :)"

ever, it would be less bad if it was at 3 or 4 AM

  but it was at 10 PM

9:01 PM 

Current profile picture is him and someone else dressed like Mormon Blues Brothers

 David: jesus

  screw that guy

 me: I think that I have made my case beyond a shadow of a doubt that he is an asswipe

 David: no question

  i confirm it

our court has spoken

  he is an asswipe

 me: I think that is a good AH post

  but we will have to change ___  and the names of the parties involved.

 David: ha